Top Ten Signs You’ve Been Reading or Writing
Too Much Star Trek Voyager Fan Fiction. . .

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FanFic is Good. Too much FanFic can be Bad. Watch for the following signs:

#10: You start referring to your husband as your First Officer and your children as “The Crew”

# 9: You start referring to trips to the grocery store as “Away Missions”

# 8: Upon returning from said Away Mission, your husband regrets to inform you that he crashed the minivan. Your response? “Eh, that’s ok. We have others.”

# 7: You think CPR is sexy. Or possibly . . . foreplay. "Breathe, damit, Breathe!" OMG, SO HOT!

# 6: You don’t understand why the microwave is ignoring your verbal requests for vegetable bullion.

# 5: You’ve started referring to the couple next door as “Tom & B’Elanna”

# 4: Even worse, they’ve started referring to you as “Janeway & Chakotay”

# 3: Before going down to the basement to adjust the thermostat on the furnace, you preface it with “I’ll be in Engineering!”

# 2: When visiting the local garden center, you feel compelled to call the manager over to complain about the paltry selection of dilithium ore.

# 1: You do a double-take when looking at the keypad in your office elevator. You could have sworn the penthouse button said “Push for PWP”

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